18 days to go...Euphoria and Anticipation

Paro and Bmm have officially embarassed me by putting such a nice description of me....I think yehi fayada hota hai apna introduction na likhney ka

18 days left today ....wow!! time does fly fast but then that was never a mystery ...

The euphoria in my title comes from another successful party we threw to celebrate diwali this past saturday ...LOTS of people came , there was great food courtesy paro , great decoration courtesy panku and I pitched in here and there too ..

There was an arti , followed by food and then jua (teen patti) , we ended the day with the game villagers and mafia .The evening was fun filled with everybody aahing and ooing over the gazillion diyas , the authentic diwali decor and ambience and ofcourse great food .

End result -we were all pleased with our hard work ....and did I say TIRED .Looking forward now to the next bash already.

The anticipation in the title comes from the India trip. Iam looking forward to Bmm's wedding .Shopping is almost all done ...I am still a little bit behind but trying my damndest .There will fun , happy times , dancing and forging of life long new relationships...

I looked at BMM 's work on his house , the pictures I mean ..everything looks great ,little brother .Hope you have great times in that cosy place and make great memories ..

Uma by now has some twenty songs she has ready to dance on ... Iam swamped , worked up, worked out and confused on how time just flits away ........

India ....Iam ...a ...coming (Big in"sex and the city " style)

18 days!!

wow, it is down to 18 ...
where did the time go? Just one weekend left till we leave, while that is exciting.. it stresses me out :) I haven't started packing and work has been crazy, and it is promises to keep being crazy till the moment I leave.
We had the diwali soirée this weekend, my whole house smells of food and I have like five garbage bags full of stuff to throw out, nu mashi did lo0vely rangoli and panku did a great job of decorating the place. We played teen pati in honor of the occasion and had some good food.
Time changed to daylights saving this weekend, which means we got an extra hour in our weekend. But I am dead tired ... or maybe it is just monday morning blues.
Uma got dressed up in the 'princess' costume today to go to school. It is halloween today and kids get to go school all dressed up :). She was so excited and got ready in record time.
Last night, before Nu mashi left, uma and nu mashi had a conversation:

bye uma, see you next weekend.
bye nu mashi, but I will be with daddy, next weekend.
Oh, then the weekend after that, but we leave that weekend... wow, next tiem we meet we'll be going to india!!!
Yay! we are going to india!!


Yay!!

20 days to go.

I have been missing ina ction many days and I intend to make up for it ... the dday and our flight keep getting closer and theres tonnes of work to be done

packing , I still have gifts to buy , grooming , exercise , etc etc etc ....antd I still have my proposal to be sumbitted ..hey bhagwan , so much work and so little time

We are celebrating diwali today ..we are epecting about 20 people ...Have everything to do from buying groceries, cooking , decorating ...will take all the time we have ..but I look forward to it and organising it

It should be fun

All Quiet on the eastern front?

Haven't heard anything from anyone in this entire week.. i guess every one is busy.. take time and write stuff people! these days are not going to comeback ...

Anyhow, Uma gets a haircut today and the two week countdown till we leave for india begins. This weekend is the diwali bash which means with the breakneck speed of work, i have only one weekend left for the packing. And I have the dreaded beginnings of the fall flu.
Thankfully, I was good about the shopping and it is all done and all that is left is packing. 14 days to the day we leave ...

24 days to go..The Baaratis

today is the 28th of october ..I wrote this entry on the 25th and for soem reason did not post it ...Its been a week or more since I out in any entries ...
I did write a lot of them ....in my head ......:-)

Although there are just about 20 days left .I thought it still alright to introduce to the baraatis..A little late in the day but me says ..what the heck ..

So here we go

Paro rani
Big sister , the queen bee ..nobody should go by how frail she looks ,she packs quite a punch in that small frame ..A admirable woman , she is self made and is doing one heck of a job with her career , her beautiful home and most of all raising that angel we all call UMA .She works for Microsoft and plans to p-a-r-t-y at bmm's wedding

Panku
Thats the moniker everyone has for my dearest hubby ..I call him totaraam and he 's going to kill me for calling him that publicly .This guy is self made and as unflappable as they come ..Its very tough to make him angry or pick a fight with him .One of his biggest strenghts is courage under fire and I admire for him that. Still love him as much as when we met over three and a half yrs ago..No wait , its more:-) ...He's my rock ...and is getting ready to rock the wedding ..rock on Panku:P



Uma
Well, this pint sized dynamo single handedly packs as much punch as the rest fo us combined and is always the center of attention . Shes the apple of the whole khandaan's eyes :)
I look forward to her prancing and tippy toeing at the wedding with a dupatta and her ballerina moves .Love you little one


Ma and Papa The main organisers of the wedding , they are awesome and I have no more to say ... Iam sorry to force my wedding pics on you guys but those are the ones I have of mom and dad :-)



Yours truly

Well someone describe me for I have suddenly run out of words .............


Choti Behen, hum aa gaya hoon :)
i will take this honour of describing the 6th and the most prominent barati .. nu masi, is a person with a resolve of steel, a wonderful smile, lovable sense of humour and capable of emotional attachments like no one else i know. yours truly will always remember how much care she took of me ... supporting me .. encouraging me, feeding me ( with the tastiest of food btw), and defending me. I am totally in awe of her ability to hold on to relationships and to nurture them ... aajkal behen MBA bhi khatam karne ko hai.
Akdum mast !
-bmm

Let me add... actually, there is not much to add, other than there is no one quite like her :)

- paro

23 days to the wedding!!

Nothing new on the prep front.. 17 days to the day when we leave for India and 23 days to the wedding ....
Today was the first foggy morning of the season. We woke up to everything covered in a white cloud. Uma was very excited " look mommy, I can't even see the tree in our yard!"
Fall is giving way to winter, mornings are colder and the beautiful fall colors have tranformed to avenues of rusty trees. The pretty yellows and oranges have changed to rusty brown and the dry crackling leaves cover the sidewalks. We go to a pumpkin patch on friday, to pick up halloween pumkins. Hopefully, Nu mashi will be with us on friday when we carve the jack-o-lanterns. Starbucks has the pumkin-spice lattes out in honor of the season.

It is diwali this weekend in NRI land and Nu mashi has arranged a nice 'Jua' party in its honor. The fare is going to be mom's diwali menu-- stuffed gobhi, rajma, dahi vaada... I am adding palak paneer and lamb korma to the menu. And ofcourse garam, garam puri. The best part of the parties for me and minu is the prep: decoration and cooking.

Just two more weekends before we leave. Even I am starting to get all excited :)

"Kajra Re"

Myself - "Uma, What about my steps for Muku mama's wedding, have you decided yet, when are you going to teach me? "
Uma - "I don't know"
Myself - "How come Uma, you told me last time you were thinking about it, what happened the wedding is very close now, I am depending on you, You have to teach me guy steps"
Uma - "Ya, I know. You can dance like 'Bunty'."
Myself - "Yes but you have to teach me, so how do I do it, show me"
Uma - "I have not decided yet. I am thinking fast now"
which is a definite improvement over "I have not decided yet. I am thinking"

Uma also gave us a preview of her dance presentation which happened to include a somersault. I need not say more .. :-)

Now I guess its Nu Maashy's responsibility to make sure she does not develop cold feet on the wedding night. As per Uma, Nu Maashy is the strongest of us all and I agree. They make such a lovely team. So So Cute ...

I am eagerly waiting for the fun night.

KarvaChauth

Divya and Bmm have been talking about Karvachauth and sargi over the last week. Here is an attempt to explain this somewhat weird festival, the tradition and the stories, tinged with my recollection.

Karva Chauth is considered one of the most important fasts observed by the married Hindu women. On this day the women pray for the welfare and long life of their husbands. The festival is followed mainly in the northern parts of the country. Married women eat food early in the morning, before sunrise. They are not supposed to eat or even drink water during the day. In the evening the ladies listen to the Karwa Chauth Katha (the legend). The fast is over at moonrise.

The history
The fast of Karva Chauth is of particular importance to Hindu women as they believe it ensures the well-being, prosperity and longevity of their husbands. The origin of this festival was based on something that has gotten completly lost. Long time back, girls used to get married at a very early age, and had to go and live with their in-laws in other villages. If they had any problems with their husband or in-laws, they would have no one to talk to or seek support from. Their own parents and relatives would be quite far and unreachable. There used to be no telephones, buses or trains ...
Thus the custom started. At the time of marriage, when bride would reach her in-laws, she would befriend another woman there who would be her friend/sister for life. It would be like god-friends or god-sisters. Their friendship would be sanctified through a small Hindu ceremony right during the marriage. Once the bride and this woman had become god-friends or god-sisters, they would remain so all their lives and recognize the relation as such. They would also treat each other like real sisters. During any difficulty later in life, involving even the husband or in-laws, these women would be able to confidently talk or seek help from each other.
Thus Karva Chauth started as a festival to celebrate this friendship (relationship) between the once-brides and their god-friends (god-sisters). Praying and fasting for the sake of husband came later and is secondary. It was probably added, along with other mythical tales, to enhance the festival. In any case, husband would always be associated with this festival, because the day of starting this friendship between two god-sisters was essentially the day of bride's wedding. It had tremendous social and cultural significance once when world lacked the ways to communicate and move around easily.

Karva-Chauth
This festival is glorified and widely solemnized by the Hindus and Sikh of north-western India. Translated, Karva meaning a clay pot and chauth means fourth. This festival is celebrated on the on the fourth day after the full moon in Kartik month of Hindu lunar calendar. This year this day fell on the 20 of Oct. A few days before Karva Chauth, married women buy new karvas, paint them on the outside with beautiful designs. Inside the pot, they put bangles and ribbons, home-made candy and sweets, make-up items and small clothes e.g. handkerchief/scarf etc. The women then visit each other on the day of Karva Chauth or immediately afterward, and exchange these karvas.

Sargi
Sargi is the pre-dawn karva-chauth meal. The meal is usally prepared by the mother-in-law, for the daughter-in-law, the idea being- the mom is grateful to the girl, who is praying and fasting for the long life of her son, tries to help her get thru the day-long fast. The mother-in-law also presents her daughter-in-law with gifts, which may be a piece of jewelry or a saree.

The ritual
The pooja preparations start a day in advance. Married women buy the shringar or the traditional adornments and the other items like the karwa, matthi etc. Early in the morning they have the sargi. In the late afternoon women gather at a common place like temple or a garden or someone's place who has arranged the pooja. An elderly lady or the pujarin (priestess) narrates the legend of Karwa Chauth. A special mud pot, that is considered a symbol of lord Ganesha, a metal urn filled with water, flowers, idols of Ambika Gaur Mata, Goddess Parwati and some fruits, mathi and food grains. Every one lights an earthen lamp in their thalis while listening to the Karwa story. Sindoor, incense sticks and rice are also kept in the thali. Women wear heavy saris or chunries in red , pink or other bridal colors, and adorn themselves with all other symbols of a married women like, nose pin, tika, bindi, bangles, earrings etc. Once the moon rises, the women see its reflection in a thali of water, or through a dupatta or a sieve. They offer water to the moon and seek blessings. They pray for the safety, prosperity and long life of their husbands. This marks the end of the day long fast.

The kaatha
A long long time ago, there lived a beautiful girl by the name of Veeravati. She was the only sister of her seven loving brothers, married to a king. On the occasion of the first Karva Chauth after her marriage, she went to her parents' house. After sunrise, she observed a strict fast. However, Veeravati couldn't stand the rigors of fasting and was desperately waiting for the moon to rise. The seven brothers who loved her dearly, were very disturbed watching the distress of their sister and decided to end her fast by deceiving her. Then the brothers reflected a mirror through Pipal tree leaves. The sister, taken it as moon rise, broke the fast. The moment the Veeravati ate her dinner, she received the news that her husband, the king, was seriously ill. She rushes to her husband's palace and on the way, she meet Lord Shiva and his consort, Goddess Parvati. Parvati tells her that the king has died, and all because the she broke her fast by watching a false moon. Veeravati asks her for forgiveness, the goddess tells her that the king would be revived. But to achieve this, she would have to undertake the Karva Chauth fast under strict rituals, then her husband would come back to life. Thus, by strictly following all the rituals of Karva chauth, queen Veeravati relivened her husband.

And....
As a kid I remember watching Mom, on karvaChauth. She would wear the loveliest of sarees(which my dear brother told her to save for his wife) and she would smell so nice and look so pretty. We (me and mm) followed her to the pujas the years she went to them. Some years, I remember her listening to the 'katha' on the walkman( she had my grandma's voice on tape, telling the story).
One funny incident comes to mind on the topic of karvaChauth. My little sister was given a task in second or third grade to use words in sentences. The word was 'anshan' roughly translated, it means a 'fast in protest'. And the brilliant girl wrote:
" Karva chauth ke din saab aurte anshan karti hain"
All women, fast in protest, on the day of karvachauth.
:)

3Ms, now?

Day 29..Nightmare

I think it must have been the post exam tension (whoever heard of post exam tension) mixed in somewhere with the aniticipation & excitement for the shaadi.......... because I had a nightmare last night and I assure you, it was a total anticlimax to my present excited state of affairs.

So I dreamed that everybody left me sleeping and went for the wedding ..They just didnt care (Boy, I have always had a v-i-v-i-d imagination )...so from sangeet to the shadi I (and God knows why) was in sleeping beauty mode , totally oblivious to the world and in my own horrorland somewhere .

I conveneintly got up when everyone brought the bride home and I can recall the absolute horror on my face when I realised that I wasnt part of it .A most melodramatic war of words ensued (I have watched too many hindi movies by now and they dont leave me alone even in my dreams ) and I broke into a pool of tears ........ how convenient !!

Got up ,drenched in sweat with a massive headache

Eww...dreams dont always come true ..do they ..Nah I my case they dont :-)

Three Ms back then ...

blog title ...

So, the wedding.. have you wondered what m3kishadi stands for?
Like most things, such an enigmatic name has -- a history.

m3kishadi = M3 Ki Shaadi

Translated from hindi - m3's wedding.

Obviously m3 has to be bmm, but how?

This is a old sacred secret that is not usually disclosed and passed from generation to generation in the ancient tradition of ... well, maybe not, the point is that our parents in, what can be only imagined to be a fit to bring order to the chaotic world, decided, to name their three kids such that the names started with the letter M. And, the 3-Ms were created...

When we were kids we used to write our names as :

( yeah I know so sweet)
So, when I got married, my dear pop, who is the most organized person I have ever seen, created a set of notebooks; titled: MKS ( ie. mitu ki shaadi).These notebooks had the grisly details of the wedding.. from the list of people invited, to the detailed accounts of the wedding expenses; from my trousseau, to the place of wedding, to the menu, to gifts for the groom and family, ad infinitum.

At my lil sisters wedding papa created a a second set of notebooks.. called MKS-II, which is Minu is shaadi.. since the 'm' creates confusion he added an 'II' at the end in an attempt to disambiguate.

So, MKS seems to make sense now... almost. In pop's nomenclature it would be 'MKS-III'. However, there is a significant difference. My mom teaches english and the subject-object part of the sentence structure as described in 'Wren & Martin' was passed on to me in my genetic makeup. In MKS-III, 'III' seems to signify the third bit of the acronym, 'S' because of placement... M Ki 'Shaadi- III', ie, M's third wedding. Now that first M's first wedding has gone bust, the possibility of such an acronym existing moves from the realm of far fetched imagination to cold harsh reality. I decided to move the signifier 'III' next to 'M', implying it was M that is III and not shaadi( and hopefully adding my bit of order to the chaos).

Hence, explained.

31 days

Today is the 17th of October ..the wedding is on the 18th of November...I read paro's entry and wow Pankaj made an entry too ..(only its not as funny as you think , my dear) ...My advice to you would be-crack your own jokes ...Russell Peters is getting old:P

Paro , your picture of me and Pankaj is scary ..it looks like I am depressed and about to commit suicide (or maybe I havent slept for days) and Pankaj looks like he is headed towards hell:-)

Here are my 2 cents ..one from the engagement and one from the wedding



Tomorrow my exam torture ends and I am free to do what I want :-)

"Somebody is gonna get hurt real bad"

This weekend I was threatened by Mita. If I do not write on this blog "Somebody is gonna get hurt real bad, Somebody" and I wished that "somebody" would be someone else but you all know who that someone is so ... here is my entry :-) ... he he (mickey style)

Nostalgic

It was the pujo weekend this time, went to a local confabulation. For the first time in years I felt like I was at pujo again (or maybe it was the effect of too little sleep). There was a real protima.. not a cardboard mockup I had gotten used to. There was puspanjoli... three rounds of it. There was bhog, it was lousy and cold, still it was bhog. And then the sitting around in disorganized groups as some game was being played ( it was antakshari this time...), whiling time away, lazy after too much food and the camaderie that I have seen no where but in the pujo pandal. There was an evening cultural program too, but Uma had asked ‘when are we going home?’ 20 times already and my east coast time was catching up... Besides little sis had to go back home and study.. So we left.
The weekend passed in me picking up the threads of the last sewing project, cleaning up and spending time with my darling daughter (who proceeded to show me the much promised dance number for nu mashi).
The wedding is 33 days away and we fly to India in 25 days. This will be my first trip in four years and first for uma( she doesn’t remember the other times). Nostalgia takes over me.. Last time it was a wedding too....
Here’s my favorite pic of the bride and groom from that wedding :)

35...!!!!

Three hours should not cause jet lag, but when you are operating on couple hours of sleep and working long days talking to grad students who are bitter and cynical in their twenties( what do these people know about life anyway!)and stayin up because sleeping in a strange bed is not going to happpen and you have to drive to the airport in a couple of hours.. you blog, like a zombie.
This place is a mess... and I thought driving in India would be hard:)
It is also, lovely and old.. the buildings have history and charecter...
It is not fall here yet, most of the trees are still green and the morning air doesn't have a nip, yet...
The school is nice... but UW is prettier.
Coffee sucks, mostly...( what's with the vanilla hazelnut flavouring anyway? why would you want to drown out coffee... if you need sweet caffine, 'do the dew' dude!)


As is obvious, the prep saga is on hold for me... but others seem to be going great.
Welcome Div! (love the pink!)
PL, wake up and write, or.. somebody is gonna get hurt!

btw, despite the wrath that is going to be incurred, I am sticking to my 'people in twenties don't know shit' statement. Every twenty something I have ever met ( including me in my twenties) has been so involved in their own life drama to be anything else but that. Not saying thirties is any better, but those who learn, do start showing signs of life in their thirties, they start realizing there is more to life than, just, well.. 'them'. So, my fellow bloggers ( or all of you twenty somethings) may the force be with you :), as I said elsewhere, this too shall pass.

Introduction to the Bride and Groom.. Day 36

Drum roll................Ready ???

Introducing the Bride and the Groom to be ...The bride Divya ..pretty in pink and the groom Bhaskar (I call him BMM fondly ...short for Bhaskar Maruti Mehta)all dapper and scholarly in his goatee and glasses.

Divya is a Homeopathic Doctor based in Delhi , India and Bhaskar is an IIT-aluminus and currently a PHD research scholar at FhG - Fraunhofer Gesellschaft (IPSI),Germany

Here are some pictures of them from their Arya Samaj wedding ,and a family outing

They look cute ..dont they ?:-)

Request Granted -day 37

Spoke to dad and mom yesterday ..mom told me about all the shopping , which is almost complete ..and enquired about my outfits :-)

Dad told me that he changed my name to MML from ML in the card .He said "How could I Ignore your suggestions?" ahem, ahem!!

PM is at Carnegie Mellon and BMM must be busy with all his house setting stuff...PL definitely needs to make an entry here or else he is in trouble

37 days ..yay...

Pictures

This blog needs some color so I thought I would put up some pictures of my outfits .This is one of the outfits I plan to wear ...the Lehanga is in crinkled red silk and and is shaped like a mermaid and is adequately called a "mermaid lehanga" ..Quite the Vogue in India these days , I hear. The Top is a lovely red silk creation with elaborate mirro ,bead& sequin and gold thread .A matching dupatta completes the ensemble .Looking forward to wearing the outfit.

the jewellery is also quite elabortae .The necklace is gold with red and white stones with matching earrings .

More pictures coming up ....

Oct 12...38 days to go

hi guys ..mm here ..my first entry ..I liked what pm started ...lovely idea

So ,a month before we will leave for India and exactly 38 days before Bmm's wedding .Yippee..Its been a while since there was a wedding in the Family .Mine was three and a half yrs ago, besides I could never dance at my own wedding ..and I will at this one with Uma, PL & PM .IT should be great fun .Need to get a CD of the latest "tadakta-phadakta "(in PL's words) music....

So when I asked Uma if she was ready with the choreography for our-duo-item number , Uma who is 5 told me "Umm , NU Mashi ...yeah I have something ready .When you come over to my place next time , I'll show you how it goes " Suppressing my laughter at such a grown up answer I said " Ok , so what song is it and what movie is it from?"
Uma said" Umm..I dont remember the song " ....More suppressed laughter since I dont wanna hurt my darling niece's feelings. :-)

PM and me spent the time after my exam last friday , having fun and SHOPPING ...that was a real ball, bought gifts for the folks .My expert seamstress sister stitched some more ...she completed a blouse for one of the super cool lace sarees we got for me .and completed her own blouses .PM? More stitching left after that?

I once again looked at my outfits and imagined the wedding ....FUN!!

It is thirties now :)

This is the DP week, ie the pujo week. It has been a little more than a decade since I was home for the event. I do however begin the day with the mahalaya tape( I have an old music system that still plays audio tapes, that I have saved for this expressed purpose).
We go to the local pujo this weekend, a little weird cause it will be after vijay dashami,but beggars can't be chosers.
In the wedding prep saga, I sewed some more this weekend. Some interesting things for mm and some wrapping up on my own stuff, while mm accessorized uma's dresses.
Little Uma wore the pink dress for a b'day party on sunday, " this is perfect mommy, nu mashi did such a good job with the roses, just like I wanted them!"

She is a little proud of her mom's sewing skills. I am her official darzi, as her favorite thing to do is 'watch mommy sew my dresses'. It is weird how you become more and more like your parents... it used to be one of my favorite things to do, watch my mom sew.

42 days!!

The beginning of this week marked the end of 'shrads' aka the inauspicious time during which no preparation/shopping related to the wedding can be done.
Dad sent out the wedding invitation mock up for review/preview. The guy who is to do the cards had send Dad a scanned copy of the invitation which Dad forwarded to us( wah tecnology!). It was very nice. The very tiny glitch was that MM's name was listed as ML. She was not too happy about it and asked Dad to change it. To which executive Daddy replied I shall look into the matter . :D

Uma asked me yet again yesterday
How many days to muku mama's wedding mom?
A little more than five weeks, beta.
Mom, we need to hurry up and get the pedicure then!(she has been promised a pedicure before the wedding )

43 days to go!!

There is a wedding in the family.
We are Indian, so the weddings are grand affairs, reminiscent of times when people had time and a wedding was once in a lifetime occasion, a reason for celebration, a reason to get everybody together, family, neighbors, extended family, relatives, acquaintances, business associates, dogs cats and all the strays in the neighborhood.
This time around, it is a little smaller than that, we- the family is split across three continents. Mom-Dad in India; Bmm, the groom, in Germany; Minu and Panku in Olympia (USA); Me and uma ( my daughter) in Seattle. The brunt of the work is for Mom and Dad. Bmm has a house to get ready for the bride. And we, the sisters, are busy shopping, some for the bride some for the rest of us and mostly just waiting for the trip to India and the festivities to begin.
This blog is an attempt to count down to the wedding. Each of us will attempt to chronicle our bits of the preparation, the jitters, the excitement, general commentary, witticisms, PJs, photos... whatever.
So, here we go... 43 and counting!!!